Monday, November 14, 2016

The Unfriend Zone

Many tensions are high right now, and like many out there I felt a need to unfriend people who voted for Trump.  This does not mean I don’t love these people or don’t wish them well.  I’m just as afraid for many of them and the safety of their families as I am for my own and putting them in the unfriend zone hurt me more than I can express.  So if it hurt me to do so, why did I do it? Well, put simply, I did not unfriend you because you voted for Trump, but to protect myself and other loved ones.

Let’s start off with the number one presumption and accusation.  “All Trump supporters are, racist, xenophobic, bigoted, evil, (insert the negative adjective here.)”  No. Some are, some aren’t. To overgeneralize everyone who voted for Trump as (any one of) these things is the same as thinking all Mexicans are thieves and rapists, or all Muslims are terrorists.  This irony has not been lost on me.  No, I do not think all Trump supporters are (again insert discordant adjective,) just like I can’t think all Muslims are terrorists. In fact, leading up to the election I even went around making sure people understood this about Trump supporters. My ENTIRE family voted for the man and that gave me some insights and opportunities to sit down with people and find out why they would vote for him if they aren’t racist etc.? There are reasons, if we haven’t had the chance to talk about that yet I apologize as this is not the time. This post is about why I would defend Trump supporters one day and unfriend them the next.
Trump is the adult version of the prom King. The high school leader of the In-Crowd, who not only sits at the cool kids’ table but is seen as the one running the show.  Is he a bully?  Maybe yes, maybe no.  You’ve never seen him do any physical harm to another personally. And maybe the only reason he says some of the outlandish things he says is because, for whatever reason, he feels a need to impress some of the people who sit at his table. That’s just business. He needs those votes for prom king after all, and you’re okay with that because you understand this political move. And hey, as long as you’re sitting at his table, he may let you have some of the pizza he ordered and invite you to his kegger that weekend. Good times are in store for you personally, and that’s what you need to focus on during these tough times. You’re just doing what’s right for you.  Yeah, yeah, you know he egged on a couple of the others at the table to not let that “homo” from glee club get to his locker after 5th period, but that’s not your business.  You personally don’t have anything against gay people. In fact, you secretly can’t stand those two that gave that kid a swirly. But who are you to say anything to the prom king about reeling in those others at the table?  The prom king is your friend. Your compadre.  He’s still got your vote and are those other lackeys really his problem?  Nah.

But they are. And for many, that’s exactly what those protests are about. They aren’t just people whining that they didn’t get their way. (And before you argue realize that if you want the benefit of the doubt given to you, you must extend it as well. Don’t condemn others and then whine about being condemned as a racist yourself.) Silence is a form of approval. If you don’t speak up and say “hey, you’re my friend, but that’s not okay. Please stop, it bothers me when you say racist stuff,” you’re going to be seen as someone who is perfectly in alignment with those views. Those “friends” of yours are never going to have a reason to stop giving swirlies to the gay kids, or throwing spit wads at the kids who are black, or chanting about deportation at the kids with parents from Mexico, or tripping the kids with disabilities. You KNOW this. This is the same reason why so many of you have been shouting from the rooftops that all the Muslim leaders and communities have to publicly chastise those who are doing violence in the world.

Problem is, most of you haven’t even been saying, “Okay that’s far enough. Reel it in, Trump.”  Most of you have not been telling Trump, now that it’s over, to start turning things around. And that is scary, not only for myself, but for MANY that I love. So yes, it’s likely that you were unfriended to protect myself and my other loved ones, because honestly I’m not sure I know who you are anymore or that I can really trust you. I have reason to question it.  As someone who works with students with disabilities. As someone who has many friends who are either black, Muslim, Latino, or gay or trans. Not only do I feel I’m at risk, but that my friends are. This is a very slippery slope we are on as a nation. And I am not required to give you access to my facebook, my friends list, and other information, that could potentially lead others to myself or my friends to be a victim of a hate crime.  Because yes, you may not be a bigot, but I don’t know who is sitting at your table and can overhear things. If that bully can see me post something they don’t agree with because you “liked,” “reacted” to, or commented on it… now they can identify me.  Now they can raise a stink about me working in a school with their kids.  Now a racist or xenophobe may be able to know where all my friends who practice Wicca are, or when I’m planning to meet a friend who happens to be black for drinks.  I will not put myself or others in jeopardy like that.

Now I have gotten a lot of interesting reactions to this.  People think I’m being childish, or overreacting, or that I’m unfriending people because I don’t like that they don’t agree with me 100%. That’s not the case anymore than it’s the case that 100% of Trump supporters are racists.

What I would like people to know and remember about me is, when I was in school I was kind of the leader of the misfits.  I had friends who were in wheelchairs, or socially awkward, or who was the only outed gay kid on the playground.  I tried my very best to rise up and defend them whenever I could. And what did it get me? Relentless teasing. Books thrown at my head from the second story stairwell. And when my mother found out that her favorite of my friends, whom she even called “son,” was gay, he was suddenly no longer welcome in our home.  People stood by and let it all happen, when it could have been stopped with just a little speaking up for kindness. Now tell me how I’m overreacting when my life experience and history identifies all of this as happening again.

So, no, you are not the one throwing the books at my head. Not yet. But you aren’t stepping up to stop it from happening either. Not yet, and honestly I have very little reason to trust you to do so at this point. Here’s why:

1. A great deal of trust has been betrayed.  Most of my friends have claimed to want to be defenders of the environment, and rights of all people, not just themselves. But have voted for someone who is appointing a climate change skeptic as leader of the EPA and have promised to sign an act that will allow people discriminate against others based on their religious views. That’s right, in case it escaped your attention, Trump has promised to make it legal to be prejudiced against a person based on a religious view and make it so that the government can’t punish someone for telling me that because I’m divorced (and they don’t believe in divorce) that I can’t work for them, or live in an apartment I apply for, etc. (https://www.congress.gov/bill/114th-congress/house-bill/2802/text)  And the fact that the words in this legislation are “or ACTS in accordance with beliefs,” How long will it be before women are stoned because the old testament says she cannot divorce her husband but has slept with another man?  Or a man is beaten in the street for loving another man.  Or “Thou shalt not suffer a witch to live,” (Exodus 22:18) remember that classic? Please, tell me again how I’m overreacting and shouldn’t be afraid.

2.  All of Trump’s talk about the “media” lying and urging people to cancel subscriptions to anything that says anything REMOTELY negative or critical about him (whether true or not.) He has banned newspapers from covering his campaign simply for having a headline he didn’t like. I’m a writer. You are supporting censorship, and that scares me more than anything I can possibly express.  One day very soon I could face some very serious consequences for writing things people don’t agree with if our first amendment continues to be demolished this way.

3.  One of the reasons the polls so inaccurately predicted Trumps victory is because so many felt they had to hide who they supported out of shame. Don't you feel that should say something about who you supported. The fact that you’ve only come out about it now that you feel validated by others who also feel like you should say even more. And now you may understand why those who were so vocal about hate may feel validated enough to actually act on it now.  It's what you're feeling but ten fold. So, no, just telling everyone you aren’t racist or a bigot isn’t going to convince people when you are sitting at the same table as them and doing nothing about it.  People now have reason to suspect that you merely have the decency to still feel some shame there in hiding at least that much.

In summation of that, many of my “unfriends” have claimed to be against abortion themselves, but told me that they think it’s every individual’s very personal decision that should be left between her and her doctor. I was okay that with that.  Many said even though they personally feel it’s a sin, they support the LGBTQ community and think they should be protected and feel safe as American citizens as that’s their right. I was okay with that too.  They said they are all for protecting the environment.  They said they respect women and would never tolerate listening to a person disrespect a woman so vulgarly because chivalry isn’t dead… But no matter how you want to spin it, at the end of the day, they voted in a way that proved the opposite of these things they said to me, and I feel like I don’t even know them anymore.  And if after years of friendship these people couldn’t be honest with me, why would I want to continue that toxic of a relationship?

If you’re standing up for your religious and ethical beliefs or principles by voting for Trump, that’s fine.  So am I by removing you from my friends list.  And I’m sorry to say.  You don’t get to criticize me for doing the same thing you’re doing.  Because the thing is, after all that, how can I believe you?  How can I trust you?  How can I feel like when people like the KKK come for me because they don’t view me as a “real” Christian, and I have friends who are black, gay, have had to have an abortion, or because I own a tarot deck… How can I trust that you’ll help me and not just say, “well, that sucks for you but I can’t get involved because I have to think of the safety of my family.”  And yes, of course you do. But can I even trust you to not say, “hey, I know where you can find her” to really assure your own safety?


So no.  I haven’t unfriended you because I don’t agree with your politics.  I just unfortunately feel a need to protect myself from everything you voted against—everything that makes me… well, me. Against my home, my job, my health, my well-being.  You voted for a person who has put those things at risk because it meant it was what was best for you. I forgive you for doing that, but understand that unfriending you now is what is best for me and the rest of my friends who I feel compelled to protect. You have an entire government sworn to protect you now (at a cost to me.)  I simply must take that action upon myself by refusing access. By making my voice heard that this is not okay. And I know you feel like I am the one that is making us enemies here, but that's where we must simply agree to disagree.

Be well, be safe, be happy, my "unfriends."  I'm just as worried for you in these coming days.



UPDATE:  I have already encountered "I'm paranoid" responses.  Well, as someone who has already lost jobs for sticking up for coworkers of various ethnicities, been blackmailed by a pastor, and had family shun me and give me an entire collection of Bibles in hopes to "reach" me...  forgive me if I'm of the persuasion that it is better to hopefully just be paranoid and safe, than it is to be foolishly trusting and sorry.

Saturday, August 22, 2015

Swagbucks Updated

So the Swagbucks site recently updated and that has caused a lot of pandemonia for many who have been using the site.  In other words, many seem to be experiencing this:





But change, especially THIS change, is nothing to be that concerned about.  Most things are still on the site, and work exactly as they had before.  The only things that are really that different are the layouts and how to earn with watching videos.  So here are all the ins and outs of the NEW face of Swagbucks (as well as the old) and how I earn about $75+ a month.


TIPS AND TRICKS

It took me a long time to figure out the ins and outs of the site on my own.  And there's still more to learn!  But these are some basics that will send you on your way and a step ahead of the rest.

The best/fastest ways I find I earn are...

1. Video Playlists in the "watch" tab

      This is found to the left on your homescreen under "EARN"

      -Every set of videos you watch will give you 1-3 swag bucks (depending on the length of the set.)
      -You don't have to watch each of the videos in full.  You can either click on a set and let it autoplay and complete the list itself, or you can keep an eye on the tab and click to the next video in the set a little faster.
      -Either way, Multitask while doing this!  Open a new tab for the other tasks that follow, and splitting screens also helps.  Don't waste the time these videos are playing.  Complete other tasks in the meantime!
       -Come back to this tab at the end of the last video to select a new playset.

2.  Play/Games
        Again, this is found to the left on your homescreen under "EARN"

             -Find the game called "Swag Jump."  You will be awarded 2 swagbucks for every second game you play no matter how high or low you score.  Just grab about five icons in the game and you'll be good.      -Swagjump is the fastest that you can play and "lose on purpose" without consequences.  Ie. you still earn.      -There's a limit of 10 swagbucks per day for games. (In other words, 10 games earn 10 SB.)      -It helps to let the game "rest" between rounds.  Give the computer about 20 seconds or so before starting the next game so it knows that you completed the last round and thus should be credited the next.  I've found if you play too many too fast the computer will think you're still on your first round.


3.   Search 

      (located at the top of your homepage, in the box that says "web" and has light gray lettering "search the web &earn SB.")  

   
      -It's just like you do with Google search.  I usually sit back and just type in random words in the Swagbuck Search Bar. It doesn't matter what you type in to search.  It all works the same.      -Every so often it will reward me with anywhere from 5 to 30 swagbucks.  Since the update I've been getting 12-15 SB pretty consistently.  


      -SUPER easy but to make sure I don't go "too fast" or disqualify myself from the service I usually only let myself win once per day and give it a few seconds between each search.  (though I think they allow up to 3 wins per day?)


4.   "Most Popular Ways to Earn" is at the top of the main section of the home page.  


      -Here you will find 3 amazingly simple ways to earn.  NGAGE, JUNGROUP, or DISCOVER/Watch and Earn.  In short... look for these guys:



      -I keep these ways to earn up on half of the screen with the "watch" videos open on the other half.  Resize the windows to whatever fits your needs.  You can pretty much hide the secondary windows (the windows that pop up after clicking next, altogether.)  Just make those as small as you can on the screen so they don't annoy you. My desktop usually is laid out like this:





And while I'm sure this looks overwhelming at first, it's REALLY simple after you make an attempt the first time or two.  Then I sit back, watch tv or play a video game, and just wait for the buttons to turn green to click "Next" and earn effortlessly.
      -You will either have to sample watch a few seconds of each video, or one commercial then click it to "interact" with an add to earn 2-3 swagbucks.  This can make your earnings add up SUPER FAST when your doing all the tasks at once!




5    Swag CODES


      -There is a little "gear" icon at the top of your homepage where you enter it for free swagbucks.  (Usually 3 or 4 each code.)

      -Sometimes codes are exclusive to certain countries, and some can only be redeemed through the mobile app, or the toolbar extension.  But really a swag code is the easiest way to grab some pennies.  Just copy and paste.
      -I find my swag codes through http://sbcodez.com/  as it tells you where to enter it, who can redeem it, and when it expires.


6    Shop.
      -If you're going to shop at Kohls.com, Walmart.com, Bestbuy.com, Hotels.com.... etc.  You get cash back by letting Swagbucks refer you to those sites.
      -Installing the swagbucks toolbar extension for your browser helps to never miss one of these cash back opportunities too.  Nearly everytime I visit a site that qualifies it asks me if I want to activate swagbucks shop and earn rewards before purchasing!  YAY!




7    SMARTPHONE TV APPS      (after downloading to your phone just sign in with your swagbucks sign in info.  It automatically connects it to reward you.)

     SBMobile TV app


          -REALLY fast (use the skip feature) to earn 2 swagbucks every 5 videos.
          -Unfortunately, this is only good if you have a smartphone with free wifi connection and has a limit of 36 swagbucks per day.

      EntertaiNow TV app
           -This is similar to EntertaiNow, but has a daily limit that can change from day to day.
           -A little slower, as you have to complete 14 videos instead of 5, but there are fewer commercials
           -Limit of 12 SB per day

     There's also LifeStylz TV app and Sportly...  and...  really there are a lot.  You could probably earn your daily goal easily off these alone!


8    Special Offers
     Again to the left of the screen there will be a tab that says "Discover" under "Earn"

     -Here is where you'll find a lot of videos and slideshows that are worth a swagbuck or two just for clicking on them.  EASY BUCKS!!!  (I like the "Radium One" tab in this feature.)  You want to pay attention to the details of how to earn on each one before clicking though.  Look for things that say "slideshow" or "video" in them.
      -The easiest earnings come from the videos, slideshows, and quizzes designed to help you "learn" about diabetes, or MS, or ADHD, or....  whatever.  They're paid for by the pharmaceutical companies that run adds on those "educational"       -While yes, there are other "better paying" offers here too PROCEED WITH CAUTION.  I really can't stress that you shouldn't fall into that trap, enough.     -Remember never enter a telephone number or credit card number unless REALLY MEANING TO.  Even for "trial offers"  They usually don't cancel on their own and you'll get a bunch of telemarketers calling your number if you aren't careful.  Just remember this is not Swagbucks collecting that info, but the advertisers Hiring Swagbucks to connect them to you.




OTHER IMPORTANT TIDBITS for earning:

    -Pay attention to your "daily goal" meter at the top of the homepage.  (Hover the mouse over it and it will reveal what your goal is for the day and track your progress towards it.)

          *This is where the REAL bucks come in. If you meet your goal every day for 7 days, you will not only get your daily bonus but a winning streak bonus too.
          *Bonuses are credited to your account on the 5th of every month.  So anything you earn the rest of this month will be credited by or on the 5th of next.
              *You only need to reach your first goal to have it count towards your winning streak, BUT, I recommend going for the second amount.  The more you win the higher the goal becomes, and the higher the goal becomes the more your bonus will be.  For a while I was at a second rung goal of 230 swagbucks a day, and that got me an extra 25 swagbucks a day.  Doing the math, that was a bonus of 750 swagbucks a month, not counting winning streak.
           *Completing winning streaks are important.
                  7 days= 25sb
                14 days= 100sb

                21 days= 200sb
         a full month= 300sb

   -Stay away from the surveys!  They are often pointless, really long, and usually "disqualify you" at the last second anyway.  SUPER FRUSTRATING!  This is the biggest complaint people have on this site.
    
    -Watch for CONTESTS.  (Usually seen as an icon at the top left of your home screen.)
          *You have to "sign up" or agree to be assigned a team.  But in one of the last contests I got a bonus 100 swagbucks for being on the LOSING team. (The winning team got 500 I think.)

    -NEVER ENTER CREDIT CARD info!----unless you're really meaning to buy something through the "Shop and Earn" feature.  (I stay away from all the "special offers" things, as they can be very spammy.)  Don't waste the money you're earning buy signing up for useless services!


    -Redeeming for gift cards can seem tricky the first time and takes about a week to credit, so it's natural to be nervous.  But just give them time to "process" your request.  You'll get your money!  And I will help you with all of that when you get there too!



some FAQ


How do you get paid?: 
 In "gift cards," or so they're called.  But I usually select the PayPal gift card option, which deposits to my bank account after verifying with PayPal.  It takes about 10 days for this processing to go through but it's never failed me yet.

Is it a scam?:
No, I have been paid every time I've requested my rewards and I've been doing this for a couple years now.  (But you do have to be patient for processing sometimes.  Remember they have THOUSANDS of prizes to process every day.)

How can they afford to pay people?: 
Think of it this way--Have you noticed all the ads on facebook lately?  Do you realize how much money Facebook is making off of that?  Well, Swagbucks is a lot like Facebook, but without "friends" (or as much drama.)  It's a social hub that advertisers are paying for space on, and Swagbucks is giving you a cut of that money as a reward for clicking on links, or shopping at certain stores.  Swagbucks isn't really paying you, the advertisers are!

Do I have to enter a credit card or anything like that?: 
 NO!  AND DON'T EVER DO THAT!  (See sections about Special Offers and Shopping)

How much are Swagbucks "worth?":

Every 100 Swagbucks is about 1 dollar.  So it's a slow build, but think of it like putting change in a piggy bank every day.  It adds up FAST.  I average $75 a month.  (That's an extra $900 a year for doing practically nothing!)

How do I sign up?: 
Easy.  You can even connect it to your facebook account so you don't have a pesky login screen to type in each time.  But if you could do my a HUGE favor, let me refer you!  It will help us BOTH out in the long run.  (Referrals earn 1 cent for every 10 cents you make outside of bonuses and similar earnings.)  All it takes is you signing up via this link:  www.swagbucks.com/refer/Katartr53190ive


If you have more questions please leave them as comments.  My referrals will have priority in Q&A of course.

Tuesday, August 4, 2015

To Breathe or... Dammit, Wisconsin!



This sculpture by Isaac Cordal pretty much sums up how many feel about the state of politics. Politics in the U.S. arena has become an American football game; everybody seems to love what's at the heart of it, but at the end of the day it's mostly about penalties, flags, replays, challenges, sponsorships, and watching the clock run down to the end of the quarter.  And of course, on occasion you get some a-hole cheating by deflating the game ball, or pumping steroids.  Point is, politics have become a game in this country, and nothing more.  Many love the underdog but the rich kids with the best sponsors score the most often.

But this sculpture is directed at a pretty specific subject hitting the political walls; climate change. And I think the statement the artist is making with this sculpture entitled, "Politicians Discussing Climate Change," is hitting things a bit on the nose this week.

Recently the U.S. took a pretty small step in the direction of, well not "fixing" the problem, but maybe slowing it down a little.  We have a new "plan" taking effect soon to limit carbon emissions from fossil fuel power plants.  This plan has a deadline of a whopping 15 years.

To see the announcement of this plan, you can watch this video...  Just bear in mind that there will be a lot of videos in this post for full comprehension:



If you want to fully understand what climate change is, why it's a problem, how we know it's happening, and the science behind it,  I highly recommend watching this video.  However it's an hour long, so if you have to save it for later and come back to it, just keep reading for now.

Here's a very condensed version.  Long story short, this is happening:







Now, why am I giving you the chance to educate yourself about all of this? And why now?  Because for some unknown reason, Wisconsin Governor, and now Presidential Candidate, Walker, has decided the correct way to react is by joining a lawsuit against the Environmental Protection Agency.  Yeah... For citizens of WI this shouldn't come as that much of a shock to those who know about his history with the Department of Natural Resources in WI--though it's still something alarming.

While the EPA's Clean Air Plan is being considered "innovative" as it is the first federal requirement, it is NOT the first plan in the United States.  In fact there was a suit not too long ago (in 2004) in which 8 states sued major power companies to reduce their air pollution, during which, not one of the defendants denied that climate change is occurring.  In fact, many power companies have already begun reductions, and have come up with plans for doing more for "clean energy" in the future. (You kind find all this information in that PBS documentary shown above.

The point is, there is very little argument on that end--which leaves me very confused about presidential candidate Walker's response and joining a lawsuit against this plan of action:

“Yet again, President Obama is taking unilateral action and overstepping the limits of his authority to pursue a political agenda.  The Obama Administration ignored the significant, overriding issues that will increase costs for Wisconsin ratepayers by up to $13 billion, unnecessarily harming families and killing manufacturing jobs.We will examine the final plan in detail, but clearly Wisconsin’s extensive, constructive comments to the EPA have fallen on deaf ears in Washington.Wisconsin has taken every opportunity to express that the Obama Administration is not only exceeding its authority by issuing the EPA’s final rule, but is pursuing the least efficient way to make environmental gains.Today, I am asking the Attorney General to take immediate action to protect Wisconsin ratepayers and workers from the devastating impacts of the Obama Administration’s actions.In addition, I am directing the Department of Natural Resources to work with the Public Service Commission to evaluate the financial impact of the final rule.”    
*Source -- http://fox6now.com/2015/08/03/clean-power-plan-pres-obama-unveils-major-climate-change-proposal-gov-walker-responds/
So let me calm a few feelings you may be experiencing from that statement down before you keep reading.

1. Yes there may be a small increase in some costs while we adjust to the new plan, but that will not be anywhere near the the number Walker made up in this statement. It will not cost WI 13 billion, and nor will it destroy jobs. People want to live and work in a place that they can also breathe.  If anything, the formerly pristine state would draw more to it for it's environmental hospitality. And our individual health care costs will decrease. (Again watch the PBS video to find out why allergies and asthma are becoming more of a problem)

2. It's a joke that Walker wants anyone to take his comment about working with the DNR seriously. He fired half of the DNR scientific staff on April 22nd of 2015. (Earth Day.)

3. Walker doesn't just "seem to think" but he KNOWS without a doubt that if he uses language that associates this EPA plan with President Obama, the people who already hate Obama will automatically side with Walker without giving it much more thought. Don't fall for that. You're better than that. Take the issue out of the political realm and simply decide if breathing clean air is something you want for you and your children.

And 4. We have 15 years to take action with implementing a plan of choosing for each state.  That's right, each state is being allowed the flexibility and a large degree of autonomy in this "plan" so the states can do what is right for them and their citizens.  Think about this.  15 years ago, a CD walkman with "no skip" feature was the height of personal tech.  Now we have phones that can email, take and edit photos, show our faces while talking to a person, and store thousands of songs and videos for our entertainment in our pockets.  Imagine the technology that can come along in that time!  15 years is a long time to work on low cost and efficient energy tech.



But it's simple really.  We NEED to keep our air clean! I like breathing, and not getting cancer for doing so. I find it funny that the state I live in banned smoking in all public buildings, but is joining a lawsuit against keeping these other harmful emissions under control.  It's the future, here and now, and there are alternatives to power sources that are cleaner and wiser. And if you want to make this an "economy" justification let me stop you right there and explain how this lawsuit will HURT not help our economy for YOU.

Besides a good economy is a scapegoat, BS, buzzword catch-all, political entity anyhow.  I mean... China has a booming economy, right? Always lending us money? Okay. I'll go with that for now. However, that doesn't mean that the people of China are well off. The average pay in 2012 (most updated figure found) was the equivalent of 4,755 dollars. And yes, limiting pollution and such out there has been known to have some negative effect on the "economy" overall. But as pointed out, a good economy doesn't equate to decent living wages or conditions. I encourage you to take a look at the article I'm posting as the first comment on this to see what it's like in China. Pay attention to #1 in that article. They have a FAKE SKYLINE for tourists to take pictures with because their air pollution is SO BAD you can't see it properly.

The economy doesn't have to hurt as a result here. We have skilled workers such as laborers, scientists, technicians, etc... to build, run and maintain new solar plants, and wind farms. It's an opportunity to create new jobs in place of the old ones. No one looked at the automobile and said, "But what are the people that make horse buggies going to do now!? Stop the popularity of the automobile!" No, people adapted and so did the workforce around it.

The bottom line is, I want to be able to swim in lakes, go for a run, eat picnics, and see the stars! And those things are priceless to me!  Tell Walker, and the other 4 Governors in this lawsuit that are trying to stop progress, that you don't support what they are doing. Not supporting a single decision they make doesn't have to mean you don't support THEM, but let them know what you care about so they can too. Tell them that you don't want your tax dollars going to waste paying for a lawsuit that will only prolong the inevitable. More efficient and cleaner power will happen eventually.  Let's not leave our states having to play catch up with the rest.

Tell them that you like to breathe.




Also, for the science about the ozone layer and how cfc's affect it, you can try and wrap your head around this (which is college freshmen level intro to chemistry btw.)

Monday, July 13, 2015

The "Semi-Colon" and Tattoos



I've been reading a lot of controversy lately about the Semi Colon Tattoo.  People hate it, people love it, and people are fighting over it.  For me, possibly the most ironic thing realized while reading the slew of hateful internet comments about the punctuation mark tat, is that the grammar and spelling in those comments are so atrocious that I can't believe that any of these individuals would know what a semicolon is or how to properly use it in a sentence anyway.

For those of you who don't understand grammar rules surrounding the semicolon, I'll just leave this here:  http://theoatmeal.com/comics/semicolon    Explore at your own pace.

Weird


So, here is the reason for the controversy. (For those of you who are in need of playing catch up.)  This hated-by-college-professors-everywhere punctuation mark is being caught in a tug of war struggle between two main factions.  First there are those who have lost a portion of their colon (the organ) due to any disease, (though mostly cancer or crohn's victims.)  This is a quite literal and clever play on the symbol's name: semi-colon.  Ha!  Get it?  Because they, or someone they love, don't have a whole, functioning....  ah, nevermind...
The other faction trying to stake a claim on the mark is all about suicide prevention and mental health, and thus they are emphasizing the metaphoric rule of the semicolon: where you thought a sentence would have ended it continues anew.  It wasn't the end at all!  Surprise!  Just like you thought you were gonna...  um, well...  yeah...

Now let me say right now that BOTH are worthy causes, and worthy of claiming the mark.  (Even if you don't understand how to use it in an actual sentence.)  I have lost friends and loved ones to suicide.  I have lost friends and loved ones to colon cancer.  It doesn't matter who had "claimed" the mark first.  There is room for BOTH factions.  After all that's what a semicolon does, you idiots!  It takes two separate clauses and joins them together showing they are related though stand on their own.  Members of both factions have faced hardships and have overcome, or continue to struggle to overcome, them.  It is so insanely silly that people who have been through hell and back would point fingers at the other party and say, "how dare you use the same symbol I use."  Especially when it could be seen as something beautiful that brings these individuals together.  Surviving, or battling darker days.

So, here are a few rules and tips I'm putting into place for a better, and more peaceful understanding of all this commotion.

1.       How to tell the difference.
A person who has a missing portion of their colon will likely place the tattoo on a shoulder, or arm, or stomach, or just about anywhere, really.  Meanwhile a person raising awareness for suicide prevention often has the mark across their wrist.  It’s something easily visible to them when reaching for a razor blade or bottle of pills, hopefully stopping them—savvy?

2.       Don't get one of these tats if you can't handle questions about it!  Or at least get it in a discreet place that won’t prompt unwanted questions.  People are going to be curious about any tattoo.  It’s natural to ask, and getting affronted is not going to help anyone.  Unless if they are being jerks about it, look at it as an opportunity to educate others and raise awareness for your cause.  (Which is why many people are getting the tattoos in the first place. Duh!  Raising awareness!)

3.       Don't assume you know what it means.  If you haven’t caught on by now, (then I don’t know what you’ve been reading this whole time,) but two very different factions are at war over claiming this symbol at the moment.  If you see a person with this symbol tattooed on their person, it could be for either thing.  Or maybe they just like grammar.  Who knows!?  Ask if you really must!

4.      And Lastly, don't hate on someone for putting a visual reminder of a hardship they lived through on their body. I already explained that there is room for both groups in this.  The symbol can join them, and keep them separate at the same time.  But that’s not what this rule/tip is about.  This is for all the haters out there who are saying this is a horrible “attention seeking” tattoo—especially for those facing suicidal thoughts.  Raising awareness, is not the same as "attention seeking," and neither is reminding yourself of the potential for better days ahead.

I read so many comments like this one responding to an article about suicide awareness/prevention, (I left the bad grammar intact of course):

“Can do it without a tattoo. Don't need to come part of a fashion and show off the fact you had something hard to deal with in your life and just like the attention of it. Grow up. People love drama. Just get on with it. You ent the only ones how have problems. Shit happens. Deal with it and move on. Having this tat means you keep that shitty past with you forever.”

To this ignorant comment I had the pleasure of responding: 

“Or it's a reminder that whatever happened before, wasn't the end.  There is always more to be said.  A happier life to move forward to.  I find it funny that the tattoo is supposed to represent exactly what you're saying.  'Move on with your story.'  Some people just need to remind themselves that.  Everyday.  If YOU can do it without a tattoo, then bully for you.  Why tear down others that need a little help, or reminding?

“Oh, and just FYI...  one of the demographics that have the highest statistics for suicide rate?  Veterans.  1 takes his or her own life every 65 minutes.  Way to be a dick and tell people to "just get over" the suffering they did on YOUR behalf.”

The long of short of it is…  If you are an individual who has been lucky enough to not deal with either of these issues, suicide or surgery, then shut up.  You don’t know what you’re talking about, and hopefully never will. You may be right, “everyone has problems.”  There’s just no need to add on to someone else’s pile, okay?  Don’t be a dick.  And if you’re an individual that falls into one of the demographics using this symbol as a tattooed reminder, remember that there is room for everyone.  You, of all people, should know that life is far too short to be petty and angry over a tiny little mark that so few know how to properly use in a sentence to begin with.

Wednesday, February 11, 2015

Financial Responsibility, Special Needs, and Politics.

For those of you who don't know what I do for a living right now (putting myself through school) it's teaching/tutoring students with disabilities. This ranges from visual impairments, hearing impairments, autism spectrum, down syndrome... you get the idea... UWW Whitewater is one of the most accessible schools in the country for students with disabilities. We have a champion wheelchair basketball team, 15 miles of sidewalk to assist mobility, and more. I'm proud of where I work and what I do. It's hard, stressful, and pays hardly more than minimum wage after years of working there and becoming the lead of my department, but that's okay. I do it because I know I'm damn good at it, and these kids need me. I've been told time and time again by my students that I'm the best tutor they've ever had and I'm the most requested tutor for CSD. So yes, damn proud.
Now here's what's bothering me right now... There are rumors. So far, they are just rumors, yet to be confirmed, but circulating none the less, that the 300 million dollar budget cuts are going to effect Students with Disabilities most. Why? Because currently the standards for accessibility laws are somewhat lacking. In other words, all we do at our campus to make our students feel comfortable and give them an equal chance at education is considered "excessive." And since we've already cut and stripped every other area of campus to bare minimum over the past few years, this is one of the only area left to take a hard hit. But I'll say again, this is a "rumor" at present, unconfirmed. Unfortunately a very likely to be true one. But rumor or not, my students are coming to me for answers in a panic, which makes focusing on their studies all the more difficult. And even if I did have answers, I am strictly forbidden from discussing the budget, or politics with any of them per regulations of our department.
So, I am discussing this here, raising my voice so all can understand the impact of certain actions. I know this may alienate me from some of you, and know many of you may want to end your friendship with me after this. I know some of you will want to believe none of this is true and listen to commercials and political sound bytes that make you feel warm and cozy about this travesty instead of hearing out someone directly reporting as an eyewitness. That's up to you. And I can't blame you. Ignorance is bliss. If I could turn a blind eye and live in a world of make-believe, maybe temptation would get the best of me to do exactly that. But I can't.
Bottom line is, we want our cake and to eat it too. And our governor has promised both. And it's true, property taxes have lowered as a result of these budget cuts. A whole five dollars. A future is being stolen from many students so the average property tax holder can afford one more meal at a fast food restaurant. That's what was voted for, but it doesn't have to be this way.
Now I'm not proposing that anyone go out and march and make attempts at recalls. That costs everyone time, energy, and money that we just don't have. What I am proposing is, if this is really a matter of just 5 dollars a person, that means we can save our university system without all that fuss.
Currently, the Whitewater campus is in desperate need of repairs. Particularly in the building that house the English, Math, and Language courses, as well as the Library, but these are far from the only buildings in desperate need. In fact the only two buildings on campus in a range of good to excellent condition are the University Center and Hyland (the building dedicated to accounting and business) which are both soon to suffer along with the rest as well, I'm sure. By donating directly to the UW schools, we can fix this, together.
But please, more than anything, keep all of this in mind when the next vote comes around. Don't let our nation go in the same direction that our state is slipping. Right now the Governor is giving more attention to his potential bid at the presidency than the job he's being payed for--but that's politics and not surprising. If you type in the words "donate to" on Google the top suggested result is currently "Scott Walker." Please, consider what is more important to dedicate your money to, and who is responsible for the need in the first place when the next election comes around.

Thursday, September 18, 2014

What is Swagbucks and Why do I Keep Talking About It?

(Skip to FAQ and Earning tips if you just want the short story.)

Okay, so getting down to the crux of things, I'm an adult student with no support from parents or family, and college education is very expensive--about 4,000 dollars per semester for tuition only.  (And that's at a State school!)  So, I need to be frugal about spending and any opportunity I have to make a little extra cash is something I pounce on.  After all, as an adult you have some additional obligations and bills that the average college student can get away without too much worry.  For example, I can't really comfortably live in the dorms with a meal plan.  I need an apartment, complete with furnishings, pot and pans, a car, etc...  However, flexibility is ALSO an issue as I need to work a schedule around classes, and group activities.  How have I done this so far?  I tutor at the Center for Students with Disabilities with the college I attend.  And while I can make my own schedule and have risen in ranks a notch or two now, it still only pays slightly above minimum wage and between work and school and homework I'm scheduled over 60 hours per week.  Of which I'm only getting paid 20 or so.   So how do I make ends meet?

Swagbucks helps.

There's a lot of conflicting opinion about Swagbucks out there.  (Mostly because some people think it's a get-rich-quick scam or pyramid scheme.  It's not.  I make about 75 dollars a month doing it in those little "down time" moments I have to spare in my day.  Mostly while waiting for class to start or a student to show up to our appointment.  Or even while watching TV sometimes (because I don't even really have to pay that close attention to what I'm doing with the site anymore.  Just a lot of pointing and clicking.)  But whenever I talk to someone about this I always seem to get the same questions.


FAQ

How do you get paid?:
 In "gift cards," or so they're called.  But I usually select the PayPal gift card option, which deposits to my bank account after verifying with PayPal.  It takes about 10 days for this processing to go through but it's never failed me yet.

Is it a scam?:
No, I have been paid every time I've requested my rewards.  (But you do have to be patient for processing sometimes.  Remember they have THOUSANDS of prizes to process every day.)

How can they afford to pay people?:
Think of it this way--Have you noticed all the ads on facebook lately?  Do you realize how much money Facebook is making off of that?  Well, Swagbucks is a lot like Facebook, but without "friends" (or as much drama.)  It's a social hub that advertisers are paying for space on, and Swagbucks is giving you a cut of that money as a reward for clicking on links, or shopping at certain stores.  Swagbucks isn't really paying you, the advertisers are!

Do I have to enter a credit card or anything like that?:
 NO!  AND DON'T EVER DO THAT!  (See section about Special Offers, Shopping and Credit Cards at very bottom of screen.)

How much are Swagbucks "worth?":

Every 100 Swagbucks is about 1 dollar.  So it's a slow build, but think of it like putting change in a piggy bank every day.  It adds up FAST.

How do I sign up?:
Easy.  You can even connect it to your facebook account so you don't have a pesky login screen to type in each time.  But if you could do my a HUGE favor, let me refer you!  It will help us BOTH out in the long run.  (Referals earn 1 cent for every 10 cents you make outside of bonuses and similar earnings.)  All it takes is you signing up via this link:  www.swagbucks.com/refer/Katartr53190ive


If you have more questions please leave them as comments.  My referals will have priority in Q&A of course.


TIPS AND TRICKS

It took me a long time to figure out the ins and outs of the site on my own.  And there's still more to learn!  But these are some basics that will send you on your way and a step ahead of the rest.

The best/fastest ways I find I earn are...

1. clicking videos in the "watch" tab
      -Every ten videos you watch will give you 3 swag bucks.
      -You don't have to watch the WHOLE video.  Just wait for the little green circle on the "SB METER" at the top of the video screen to fill in and click the next one in line.
      -I keep sound off

2.  Play
      -There is a game called Swag Jump.  You will be awarded 2 swagbucks for every other game you play no matter how high or low you score.  Just grab about five icons in the game and you'll be good.
      -Swagjump is the fastest that you can play and "lose" without consequence.
      -There's a limit of 10 swagbucks per day for games. (In other words, 10 games earn 10 SB.)

3.   Search
      -Just like you do with Google search.  I usually sit back and just type in random words in the Swagbuck Search Bar.  Every so often it will reward me with anywhere from 5 to 30 swagbucks.  SUPER easy, I usually win about 10 each time.

4.   "Swag Guy" is on the front page.  And just a generic term the community gave this picture.
      -This one is a little trickier, but FAST.
      -I tend to keep this function up on half of the screen with the "watch" videos open on the other half.  (double your earnings/half the time.)
      -You will either have to sample watch a few seconds of videos, or one commercial then click it to "interact" with an add to earn 2 swagbucks.

5    Swag CODES
      -Follow Swagbucks on Facebook and Twitter or install the Swagbucks extension on your browser to be alerted to "codes"
      -There is a little "gear" icon at the top of your homepage where you enter it for free swagbucks.  (Usually 3 or 4 each code.)

6    Shop.
      -If you're going to shop at Kohls.com, Walmart.com, Bestbuy.com, Hotels.com.... etc.  You get cash back by letting Swagbucks refer you to those sites.
      -Installing the swagbucks toolbar extension for your browser helps to never miss one of these cash back opportunities too.  Everytime I visit a site that qualifies it asks me if I want to activate swagbucks shop and earn rewards before purchasing!  YAY!

7    SBMobile TV app
     -REALLY fast (skip feature) to earn 2 swagbucks every 5 videos.
     -Unfortunately, this is only good if you have a smartphone with free wifi connection and has a limit of 36 swagbucks per day.

8    Special Offers
     -There will be a tab that says "Discover" and "Special Offers is under that
     -Here is where you'll find a lot of videos and things that are worth a buck or two just for clicking on them.  EASY BUCKS!!!  (I like the "Radium One" tab in this feature.)
     -There are other "better paying" offers here too BUT PROCEED WITH CAUTION
     -Remember never enter a telephone number or credit card number unless REALLY MEANING TO.  Even for "trial offers"  They don't cancel on their own most times and you'll get a bunch of telemarketers calling your number if you aren't careful.  Just remember this is not Swagbucks collecting that info, but the advertisers Hiring Swagbucks to connect them to you.




OTHER TIDBITS:

    -Stay away from the surveys.  They are often pointless, really long, and usually "disqualify you" at the last second anyway.  SUPER FRUSTRATING!

    -Pay attention to your "daily goal" meter on the left hand side of the homepage.  
          *This is where the REAL bucks come in. If you meet your goal every day for 7 days, you will not only get your daily bonus but a winning streak bonus too.
          *Bonuses are credited to your account on the 5th of every month.  So anything you earn the rest of this month will be credited on the 5th of next.

    -Watch for CONTESTS.  (Usually seen as an icon at the top left of your home screen.)
          *You have to "sign up" or agree to be assigned a team.  But last month I got a bonus 100 swagbucks for being on the LOSING team. (The winning team got 500 I think.)

    -NEVER ENTER CREDIT CARD ----unless you're really meaning to buy something through the "Shop and Earn" feature.  (I stay away from all the "special offers" things.  It's very spammy.)
    -Redeeming for gift cards is tricky the first time and takes about a week to credit, so I was nervous my first time.  But just give them time to "process" your request.  You'll get your money!

Saturday, June 29, 2013

GETTING REMARRIED

Hahahaha....  no.  I'm FAR from tying a second knot.  But I won't pretend like the potential of a second marriage hasn't crossed my mind from time to time.  More just the party planning portion of it than any imaginings of a second marriage.  You know, the FUN part.  Because It's natural to imagine yourself in other's shoes and, after all, it does seem like just about everyone I know is either getting married, remarried, or even having kids soon.  With so many wedding preparations abounding, it's easy to think, what would you do if it were your shindig?  (And if you read this to the end, I promise to elaborate on some of those fun bits of what I would plan.) 

As a little kid I was never the kind of girl to dress in white and pretend to have a wedding with a bunch of stuffed animals in attendance.  Nope.  I was much more the girl to imagine having super powers or battling dragons, and fantasize about growing up to someday own my own movie theater that would have an automatic delivery system so you could order popcorn or even pizza right from your seat.  Yup, I was apparently fervently determined to contribute to the nation's obesity epidemic.  Not much has changed since childhood.  Well, minus the thinking robotic food services are a good idea...  I'm still that bull headed kid that imagines awesome adventures and fun gadgets.  Deep down, (or maybe not so deep,) I'm still that kid that sees a whole world through a lens of imagination and promise.  Which is exactly why I'll likely never get married again, despite having an entire wedding near planned out.


SECOND PLACE.

As mentioned earlier, I keep seeing friends marry and remarry.  It's all fine and dandy.  I'm happy for them.  But sometimes it bothers me.  Not in an envious way by any means.  More in a, you were divorced for all of two minutes and met the REAL "love of your life" already?, kind of way.  I just feel people jump into some commitments WAY too fast.  Because I'm pretty certain that you referred to your last husband or wife as the "love of your life" once upon a time too.  It comes off as less genuine and more of you and your ex racing to see which of you can find someone to rub in the other's face first, or you just being too uncomfortable to be without someone.  ...I can think of better reasons for getting married again.

On the same note I can't stand when people approach relationships like job interviews and when asked why they're remarrying answer, "well, he gives me flowers, and has a steady job and is good with kids/animals..."  Nothing makes me wince more.  This is not a position you're filling!  If your answer is anything less than, "Because he makes me feel like I can reach out and touch the moon if I really wanted to, and makes me so happy I can't stand it!" you might want to take a step back and reevaluate the partnership.  Because I'm pretty sure I'm capable of buying my own gorram flowers, establishing my own career, and taking Fido to the vet.

Me?  I've never been so happy to be single.  I'm not saying I would turn my nose up at a relationship if it came along.  I can picture myself happy that way too.  But I will say, if I had someone in my life I probably wouldn't be as focused on my schoolwork, nor would I feel as free to go to Japan.  Why?  Because the kind of guy (once in a relationship) that is supportive of such things (I've found in my personal experience) is rare indeed.  These last five years of being single gave me ample opportunity to explore the world and discover myself all over again.  And in that five years, I've come to realize what I've worked for and what I deserve.  And that's first place.


WHAT IS "FIRST PLACE?"

Good question.  And perhaps the best way to define "first place" is by recognizing if you're second place. 


  •             Second place is when you're with someone as the consolation prize.  They actually wanted Jane Smith, but after a lengthy failed pursuit, decided to settle for you instead.  

  •             Second place is when you are dedicated to a relationship, but your husband or wife is dedicated to their job, (not even career but "job") and their family (not counting you as family,) or their friends, or their hobbies... or basically EVERYTHING under the sun except you, first.  There has to be balance and these other things need ample attention too.  But I had once listened to several years of "(insert random activity or weather condition or...) is only good for a few weeks, and we have all the time in the world."  Well...  apparently we don't.  I've never had a relationship where something or someone wasn't a higher priority than I was 100% of the time, and I refuse to pander to that kind of "partnership."

  •             Second place is when YOU'RE the one that "filled the position."  If you think your partner is more interested in your character traits or skills than they are in you?  Don't settle.  You deserve someone that loves you.  Not someone that's "hiring" you.  As much as you may be in love with that person and thinking, well as long as their mine what does it matter the reason why/maybe they'll grow to love me...  I promise you in five years or so, you aren't going to feel that way.  You're going to get tired of waiting for them to catch up to where you are emotionally, and resentful if they haven't.  I remember during my divorce talking with my ex about different ways he can replace the things I was always doing for him.  Dishwasher and laundry service kind of jokes.  (We tried to get through things with a sense of levity.)  But I'll always remember when I suggested restaurant food he replied "Yeah, but restaurants don't cook as good as you."  ...My head heard the compliment.  My heart heard something different.  I know what was meant behind the comment, but I felt if I had stayed it would have been because I was a valued "employee."  Not a wife and partner.

  •             Second place is when they deny telling you how they feel.  Now, I'm not talking about actual verbal communication.  Just communication in general.  Love gives you the jitters.  It makes us clumsy fools.  But it also gives us courage.  I'm sick of watching people admire from afar, brooding over what might have been, when they never "spoke up" in the first place.  There are a million ways to tell a person you care about them besides calling them up on the telephone.  It doesn't take vocabulary, per se.  But dude, find a way to say it one way or another, because, a word to the wise? If you love someone, you tell them. If you can't find the courage to do so? Well.... That's probably not love.  And you probably don't deserve that prize after all.



Of course there are more Second place qualifiers, I'm certain.  But these are the big ones for me.  So, I'm going to be single for a good long while still, I'm sure.  I'm picky now.  Pickier than I've ever been.  I know what I deserve because I know what everyone deserves.  To be loved.  Genuinely.  And I'm not backing down.  Me and my pet dragon are going to keep having adventures until someone comes along that can keep up with us.  Someone that has as much a sense of inner child/no settling stubbornness as I.  And if they don't... well, I still have a pet dragon, and that's awesome enough on its own.

But I promised at the beginning of this post some fun stuff if you got to the end.  Namely, what I would do if ever planning a wedding again.  Something better than stuffy white lace and boring flowers.  No.  If I ever did that whole mess again, it would be a celebration that would reflect me and my partner and our adventurous spirits.  It would be a pirate wedding.


MARRIED AT SEA

My last wedding had a guest list so large that I had to cut a bunch of my friends from it to accommodate a bunch of people I barely knew that were friends or relatives of my mom.  I pandered to everyone.  I didn't want alcohol present, because several people I knew to be in attendance have "problems" and I didn't want drama.  (Besides I wasn't legal drinking age yet either.)  But I was talked into it...  not that it mattered, since those individuals brought their own anyway.  ...You can't make this shit up.  Anyhow...  The day was very very little as I wanted it to be.  The groom was about the only thing that remained as originally planned, in fact.  But I made the best of it, and now I know exactly what to place on my list of do's and don'ts.  And my next wedding, I'm going to make certain is about my partner and I.  No one else.


I'M GOING TO MARRY A PIRATE

Let's start with the ceremony shall we?

1.  I'm on a boat!




People making a big deal about your wedding attire or those creative vows you chose to write yourself because pesky second cousin Beatrice, whom you've never met, won't appreciate the humor?  Well, a sailboat wedding is for you.  Limit the guest list to those close friends and family by having it on a boat with a limited capacity.

2. Attire.



Don't want to spend hundreds or even thousands of dollars on a big bulky dress that you're going to sweat your ass off in, be too uncomfortable to eat while wearing, and worry about staining or ruining by the end of the night?  Not to mention need your maid of honor's help to go to the bathroom because it's so hard to get in and out of?  Funny how those pirate gals had these troubles on the back burner, eh?  The fun thing about pirate wear is, you probably already have some in your closet.  Yup, grab a pair of capris, and that ratty old shirt that a bit too big, get a corset to throw on over it, and you're set.  (The picture above is actually from the Pyramid Collection for about a 100 bucks.  Which can be found here.)   Instead of spending a fortune on fancy shoes and jewelry, any gaudy costume jewelry from your local antique mall or Goodwill store will do.  And about those shoes.  Boots for the ceremony are great but for that reception?  How does abandoning painful high heels for barefoot on a beach sound?  Which brings us to...


3.  Location!




No expensive reception halls, or stuffy church basements.  Let nature do the majority of the decorating for you.  And again, did I mention the sand is more comfy to dance on than heels?  Grab some tiki-torches and some wood for a bonfire come nightfall, open the rum and let the party run itself!


4.  Menu



You're on a beach.  You've got a bonfire going, and music, and....  who needs fancy place settings and such?  Pirate food can be anything.  But c'mon, who can picture movie with a captain's table, or any pirate feast without a roast pig?  Let's do this thing luau style...-ish.  Add a few kabobs and potato salad on the side...  Hey, sounds like a good feast to me.

The drinks are as equally easy at that point.  Rum and Ale are all you need, as mentioned.  Make a Rum Punch,  or have some rum and coke, and then beer will do the rest.  No need to buy an entire liquor store.  (Just the entire stock of Rum.)


5.  Decorations.




The decorations are possibly the easiest part.  Tiki torches instead of candles, a pirate chest for a card box/gift table, sand dollars and fake jewels and chocolate coins strewn about on the sitting tables, fish net table clothes...  And hey, nature does the rest, you have the beautiful ocean and beach full of sea shells to use  If you really want candles, fill shells with was and wick.  And why not have your guests not only sign your guest book, but rope off a section of sand for writing messages in as well.



6.  The Cake and favors, or, I've Got a Jar of Dirt!






Nope.  I've seen too many cake disasters.  I used to be a decorator.  It was my job to witness them.  When faced with paying for an outrageously overpriced, and likely extremely dry and bland tasting cake, I'd rather eat dirt.  This is the best Idea I think I've ever had.  A jar of dirt cake for each guest.  No worries about it getting stale, or sand or bugs getting to it, because the jars will be sealed.  Only one small truffle dish with a cake topper will set out for the ceremonial Bride and Groom Cutting...  er...  Scooping of the cake.  (With a shovel instead of a knife of course.)  :D  The jars double as favors.  Each labelled or engraved with the names and date, a packet of flowers will accompany each to be taken home, filled with real dirt, and flowers planted in them.


7.  The Ring.



 Yes, I have even fantasized this down to the ring.  An affordable, yet stunning, and completely unique ring.


It seems the only thing I don't have in this fantasy is the groom.  So no...  no plans on ever getting married again.  Just playful imaginings of one little day.  Maybe I'll give one of the characters in a future book this fabulous ceremony.  Doesn't have to go to waste that way.  Hell, maybe I'll write in a dragon or two too.  ;)  Just for good measure.